50 Grammar Puns for Nerds to Read

This list of grammar puns is open to contribution. If you’d like to add a grammar pun to it, please submit it to us using the comments section below.

Is grammar something that is so overrated? I am not sure. Maybe sometimes it is. It depends on what you write, however, There are times when you need to use proper grammar when it comes to writing books, assignments, essays, and so on. However, if you are writing a quick thank you note to someone or a message on a greeting card, I am not sure how much of it matters. I mean, you want to make it look presentable so you do not appear dumb. However, is it really necessary to add perfect grammar to all of your work? You may be thinking what is the point in using proper grammar if you don’t have the time to check it over?

Here is the thing. There are so many tools that you can utilize when it comes to using proper grammar such as Grammarly, and I believe Google Docs has its own grammar checker. You will want to utilize those as they are free. Well, Grammarly is not if you want to deeply correct your grammar. Anyway, make yourself look good and use those tools. They are easy to use and it makes you look good if you are a writer, blogger, or academic. What more can be said about grammar? I don’t know. Let’s throw in some puns, how about 50 of them to make the topic funny.

List of Grammar Puns for Nerds to Read:

Following are some of the best grammar puns for nerds to read:

  1. Good grammar is the difference between knowing your shit, and knowing you’re shit!
  2. What do you say when you’re calming down the grammar police? Their, They’re, There
  3. What form of eternal punishment might you get for the habitual misuse of punctuation marks? Comma karma.
  4. Always remember double negatives are always a NO, NO.
  5. The teacher sent the kid who wanted to be a chicken farmer to the principal’s office for fowl language.
  6. When you begin writing a poem, but you sneeze, have water eyes, have hives is what is known as an elegy attack.
  7. Each time you make a typo, the errorists win!
  8. Only one writer in a million can correctly use a hyperbole.
  9. If you’re an expert at coining adages, what is your specialty? Maxim-izing.
  10. A simile is like a metaphor.
  11. If two wrongs don’t make a right, then why does a double negative make a positive?
  12. If Horrible and Horrific are the same thing, then why are Terrible and Terrific the complete opposite?
  13. It’s great to be Awesome! Why is it terrible to be Awful?
  14. If the pen is mightier than the sword, why do actions speak louder than words?
  15. The one thing Noah Webster said when asked why he hadn’t started his book yet was ‘I was meaning to’.
  16. What happened after a kid was given an inexpensive dictionary? He couldn’t find the words to say thank you.
  17. Why did the dumb, shy, clumsy guy throw a dictionary at the librarian which hit her head? That was because he wanted to Face-Book her.
  18. If you don’t know what the word dictionary means, how would you look that up?
  19. How do poets say farewell? They say they wish to linger longer, but it’s getting aliter-ate.
  20. If a poet writes in verse, does a backward poet write inverse?
  21. Why don’t poets like writing commercial jingles? Due to the fact that jingles are ad-verse.
  22. How do you discover a pregnant clause while editing copy? From the missing period.
  23. The student asked the teacher if he could ask a dumb question, and she said, that he just did.
  24. Grammar is the difference between knowing your crap and knowing you’re crap.
  25. The cop gave the poet a traffic ticket for driving without a poetic license.
  26. What is a poet who was known for her footwork? Iamb Woman.
  27. The actor Kelsey got his education in Grammar school.
  28. The old grammarian died by falling into a comma.
  29. What do will-writers call the sections covering family members? Relative clauses.
  30. How are those who get overly emotional about proper grammar usage described? Melo-grammatic.
  31. What is an author who writes completely perfect whodunits? Mystery mastery.
  32. The newspaper writer was on the bathroom floor in pain and moaning because the editor removed his colon.
  33. Which dinosaur had the biggest vocabulary? The Thesaurus.
  34. What does a lawyer call will section covering family members? Relative clauses.
  35. The Wolverine was fired from the law firm because he didn’t read the contract’s claws.
  36. The champion pugilist who enjoyed using lots of witty idioms and figures of speech was Joe Phraser.
  37. The burglar did not break into the library due to fearing the grammar police.
  38. If you read while sunbathing, that makes you well red.
  39. Poets say hi by saying ‘hey haven’t we metaphor?’
  40. The poet told Luke Skywalker metaphors be with you.
  41. Your eyes have their own vocabulary and what a beautiful language to learn.
  42. the past, present, and future walked into the bar and it was tense.
  43. The thesaurus’ favorite dessert is synonym buns.
  44. You are like a dictionary since you add meaning to my life.
  45. What is an incomplete Christmas sentence? A Santa Clause.
  46. The most important subject in witch school is spelling.
  47. What are Santa’s helpers? Subordinate clauses.
  48. What is an incomplete sentence relating to the Christmas holiday? A Santa Clause.
  49. Knock Knock. Who’s there? To. To who? It’s to whom!
  50. I was wanting to steal a book from my friend but he would have called the grammar police on me so I didn’t.

I hope you enjoyed these and got a laugh out of ’em. Oops, not proper grammar but oh well.

Do you wish to add your own grammar pun to the list?

Feel free to let us know using the comments section below.

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