50 Knife Puns That Are Very Sharp

This list of knife puns is open to contribution. If you’d like to add a knife pun to it, please submit it to us using the comments section below.

Knife. What is the first thing you think about when you hear this word? You may think of the instrument or utensil, or a weapon, of course, that has a sharp blade that will cut. And you need a knife for when you are eating a meal that consists of meat or something else that needs to be cut, and your fork cannot be the one to do it. And when you are cooking, you need a knife as well in order to chop up the food that you are cooking up whether it is any type of meat, vegetable, or potato. And you need knives for cutting up fruits.

Especially those hard fruits such as pineapples, watermelons, cantaloupes, or just apples. Sliced apples are a great snack, that is for certain. Either way, you need knives because you need to eat. Without knives, you would have to either eat your meals with your hands which is not appropriate to do in most cultures with the exception of foods such as pizza or others that do not require you to eat with a knife or a fork.

And unfortunately, aside from the kitchen and from mealtime, knives are a preferred choice of weapon which let’s not even go there now. Let’s keep this upbeat. So upbeat that we will talk about 50 knife puns that are so cutting. Well, maybe not really, they may be more tickling because the idea is to make you laugh, right? Okay, now let’s go over them.

List of Knife Puns That Are Very Sharp:

Following are some of the best knife puns that are very sharp.

1. How does the knife salesman greet you? ‘Hello there, knife to meet you’.

2. That knife salesman is a terrible driver because he cut me off on the road!

3. My friend who sold knives is really no longer my friend since I cut ties with them.

4. That sharp expensive utensil that you use for cooking is so very knife.

5. What band does the knife salesman like the most? Cutting Crew.

6. Did you know that knives are cutting edge technology?

7. Excuse me for not liking my knife puns, I am just trying to sharpen them up though.

8. What is a melodic knife called? A balisong.

9. Why did that knife salesman make it known that he had some digestive problems? He kept cutting the cheese.

10. You can’t really use a plastic knife for anything because it won’t make the cut.

11. Wow, that guy tried to assault me with a knife and that was a sharp moment.

12. What do you call a knife that can cut through 4 loaves simultaneously? A four loaf cleaver.

13. What does a knife salesperson say as you leave? ‘Have a knife day’.

14. I did my best to bring my Swiss army knife through customs but they denied it, so that is what I get for bringing a 4-in-1.

15. That knife salesman who wore the tuxedo was looking sharp.

16. Why is the knife sales guy too smart for his job? He is simply so sharp.

17. I applied to be a salesperson for a knife company but I didn’t get the job because I didn’t make the cut.

18. I am not sure if I should keep this dull knife because if I do it is pointless.

19. What is a knife called that has a lack of purpose? Pointless.

20. What type of knife does a cow like? A moo-chette.

21. How is it possible to do an illustration by using a knife? Because of the cutting edge technology.

22. The woman who stopped a knife fight using cake batter bravely took a whisk.

23. I attempted to buy some knives but I didn’t like any of them because they simply did not make the cut.

24. Those puns about knives you are telling me are somewhat dull, no offense.

25. The punk rock knife is really edgy.

26. Sharpening a blunt knife is silly to do because there is no point.

27. What do you do if you get into a knife fight with a bunch of clowns? Go for the juggler.

28. My friend gave me a knife set for my birthday and thought it was a knife gesture.

29. The knife would not cut the German sausage and this was the wurst experience.

30. What is another name for an off-brand Exacto knife? An approximato knife.

31. A lot of things on the internet are no different from a dull knife because they don’t have a point.

32. Why was the night salesman exhausted after coming home from work late? It was a hard day’s knife.

33. The way you worded how the sharp knives are was so knifely put.

34. Getting a new knife set after the old one was not really useful anymore is better late than knife-r.

35. The knife set I purchased was locally ma-knife-actured.

36. That knife is not going to be impressive, just a cut feeling I got.

37. Your assumption that I have a lot of knives is close, cut no cigar.

38. Cutting up that hard meat with the knives I have is easier blade than done.

39. The new knives set for sale is up for stabs.

40. One particular celebrity has an obsession on knives, and I read it on the stabloids.

41. Why did the knife salesman have to leave work and go home early to rest? He had stabbing pains.

42. The knives in this set come in all sharps and sizes.

43. Why is someone holding in knife in public so dangerous? They have point-up rage.

44. So the knife doesn’t work, there is no point in getting upset over it.

45. The knives sets that are on sale will be bought out and it will happen at a pace that is as quick as a slash.

46. The knife salesman got injured during his favorite winter sport for skating on thin slice.

47. The knife set I wanted was gone from the store at the chop of a hat.

48. Knife salespeople appreciate their jobs because a penny shaved is a penny earned.

49. My expensive knife set has turned into a conversation pierce.

50. If you lie to me I will be just like a knife because I will cut you up.

There you go, I hope these knife puns were not dull for you!

Do you wish to add your own knife pun to the list?

Feel free to let us know using the comments section below.

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